Make Way for Baby

My first steps towards Grandma-dom happened 13 months ago when my daughter and her husband were about to give birth to my first grandchild. Anticipating the baby's arrival, I realized I was gaining a new title, Grandma— or whatever my grandchild would name me eventually. My world was about to change, and a new chapter in my life would evolve. I wanted to be the kind of grandma that was cool and fun to visit, as well as a grandma who could share wisdom, a la Grandma-dom.

My daughter had been in labor for nine hours, and I refused to leave the hospital until the baby was born. Shortly after my husband left at 11:30pm, the nurse came into the room and said: "OK grandma take Amy's right leg; husband get behind your wife and hold her head; I am going to the left leg, and we are going to have a baby!" The doctor was summoned to the scene. My legs became weak. I stood there, and my heart began to race. My mind was spinning, and the song "Should I Stay or Should I Go" kept repeating itself in my head.

I thought to myself, if my daughter didn't want me to stay, then she would ask me to leave. But they had prepared for this moment for months, and I was never supposed to be in this plan. I asked Amy and David if I should leave and they both said, "NO, you have a leg!" Ending the discussion, the doctor came in looking and sounding like Dr. Ruth. She declared, "Thank you for letting me have dinner, now let's have a baby!"

How was this possible? My baby was having a baby! And right before my eyes, three generations would unfold. I began to cry uncontrollably as I watched the love between my daughter and son-in-law preparing to deliver their first child. They were so calm and supportive. They were so prepared. I was so proud and could not believe I was actually standing there watching their baby be born.

The first words I heard as I entered Grandma-dom was the nurse and Dr. Ruth yelling, "Get the camera Grandma and take a picture of your beautiful grandchild being born." I was in shock, I think, because I hadn't seen my daughter's private parts since she was a little girl and there, right in front of me as the nurse said, "Bare down and push for the last time," my daughter bared it all with such grace and beauty. Within minutes, out popped this perfect little head, and then the moment of truth, no penis. After counting all the body parts, I realized a beautiful little girl was born to the most loving parents I have ever known. Who could take a picture? My hands where shaking; my face was covered with tears. I managed to take a few shots, but should you share these shots?

It was the most amazing day of my life. I could not wait to call my husband and my mom and dad and sisters. A family was born. The mommy and daddy fell asleep next to each other in the hospital bed, and I stayed up in the chair dosing occasionally. The entire time, I felt honored that I was sitting there and seeing my children rest after a long labor of love. I thought to myself, I am no longer the mommy— in the sense that I must respect the new roles that had just been created. This would mean respecting boundaries, and I realized this when I kept hearing the song "Should I Stay or Should I Go." Now in Grandma-dom, I am glad I actually got to see how I got here.

I wonder what my daughter thought about having me there. What does it feel like to share this moment? Should it be shared? Why not bring in the whole family and see a life be delivered? Out with the stork in with the real deal. So precious, and at the snap of my fingers, my baby became a mother and I became a grandma.