My Purpose

From the day my first child Cross was born, I felt like I had a purpose in life. I didn't quite know who I was before he came along. Now I have another son Crew, who has autism and has enriched my life even more. Presently, the purpose of my life has become the overwhelming task of doing (and I do mean this in every sense of the word) the most I can for Crew. Sometimes I try too hard and get disheartened when Crew is not progressing quickly. Sometimes I try too little because I'm so exhausted and drained. I feel like I give so much that I have no joy, other than Crew's progress, in my life. Most of all, though, when I reach Crew, there's no other high in the world like it. I know that my son needs me, that he appreciates me and all that I do for him. Crew works hard because he knows he has his mom's love and support. That gives me such a feeling of satisfaction.

I know now that is why I was put on this earth. I've always been told I have a lot of love in my heart. If that extra love is needed for this child, then I am glad I have it. Fueling Crew's progress has given me purpose that I never had before. I now possess a strength for learning and teaching that I never gave myself credit for. For Crew's autism, I am thankful. I know that sounds funny but it's my life's purpose.