We all have preconceived thoughts we have developed from past experiences. Sometimes these thoughts serve us well and move us ahead positively. However, sometimes these thoughts hold us back and stop us from achieving the outcome we want
The following method will show you how to get what you want in life by cultivating and growing new thoughts that work. The technique can be used to improve your personal life as well as help you take control and help your child improve their life at home, in school or in social settings.
It's a simple technique that takes practice and coaching to replace old thoughts with new, empowering thoughts.
During my years of working with parents of ADHD children, I have seen how powerful this can be.
For example: Suppose your child has difficulty staying focused in the classroom and is failing.
Your automatic Thought might be: He is failing in school. He is never going to become anything. I am a bad parent.
Your automatic Reaction might be to yell, threaten and punish by taking things away.
Your underlying Feeling might be to feel powerless, hopeless and frustrated.
The Behavior is staying stuck and not moving forward.
With thoughts like this, having a positive outcome might be virtually impossible.
If you learn how to replace your negative thoughts with more positive, problem-solving thoughts, the chances of achieving a better solution will be greatly improved.
Your new Thought might be: I understand my child is having difficulty in school.
Your new Reaction might be: I am going to get educated to learn about accommodations and resources we can use to give him a better chance.
Your new Feeling will be that of empowerment to take control of the situation. This will greatly increase your chances of success.
The new Behavior is one of moving ahead to put a plan in place, to solve the problem.
To sustain success, you neaed repetition and reinforcement. Remember: Your thoughts may be having a bigger effect on outcomes than you realize. Changing patterns of thinking or behavior by replacing old thoughts with new, empowering thoughts can be life changing for you, your relationships and for your children.