When a couple decides to take the leap and tries to get pregnant, they are all too unaware of what they are letting themselves in for. It doesn’t matter how many books you read, or how many YouTube videos you watch, nothing can prepare you for the real deal.
Having kids is no joke; the struggle is real and when you add the daily pressures of life to kids that don’t behave like they should, then things get tough. Keep heart though, because there is a light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to persevere.
Here are some tips on what you can do to make it to the end of that tunnel.
Spell it out…
I get it. Kids can sometimes ignore you for the sake of power. They feel empowered when they stand up to you. This is completely normal and is to be expected. However, how you deal with the situation is another story altogether. Depending on their age, there are a number of reasons why they would feel the need to ignore your instructions.
When they are already in school, there might be a bully that is targeting them and their disobedience towards you is merely a cry for attention. The one thing that you should remember is that bully prevention starts at home.
You need to be sensitive and calm about the situation and reassure your kids that you are their safety net. The one that will catch them when they fall and protect them. Most of their identity is reinforced by you. So, the best you can do is to encourage them, build their self-esteem and reassure them that they are loved.
When your toddler is ignoring you, though, try and find the right time and foster learning at home. In other words, you need to get their attention when they don’t have anything to disobey and explain the rules and consequences carefully. They are still learning and will push the boundaries often.
Don’t sweat the petty stuff…
When your kids don’t listen to you, the temptation is always there to try and correct them for every single thing that they do wrong. Not to bust your bubble, but you are in for a long and bumpy ride if this is how you want to approach things. The one thing that you need to remember is that your child is in a development phase and they are constantly going to test the boundaries.
You need to choose your battles carefully. When they ignore serious commands that has an influence on their health, safety and welfare, then you have plenty of ammo and can go to war. But when the issue doesn’t impact their lives, or yours for that matter, then let sleeping dogs lie.
You’re much better off using your time on something important, like finalizing your thesis and searching for dissertation writing services. Making a big thing out of a non-issue starts a power struggle and will frustrate you more. Letting the small things slide will render them powerless and take the fun out of the fireworks, resulting in them giving up and eventually admit defeat by listing.
Being rude is never OK…
All parent will tell you that manners is one of the hardest things to teach your children. People are by nature selfish beings and when you are still learning the ropes of life, you tend to be more selfish. We are selfish with our time, money and our comfort.
That is why we tend to use a custom dissertation writing service to ease our study load. This is not a bad thing, though as the motives are generally pure.
Your kids, on the other hand, still need to know how to balance that selfishness out and don’t know what the proper conduct always is. This is why rudeness cannot be tolerated.
If your teenager doesn’t greet the guests or display disrespectful behavior, it has to be dealt with and promptly. Again, you don’t want to get into a screaming match, but you do need to lay down the law and be consistent in your enforcing of the consequences.
Your child will soon see that being polite does not cost him or her very much and that the consequences of their deeds have a hefty influence on their lives. They will also come to realize that the world does not revolve around them and that they will need the help of someone in the future, like essay help online.
Take away the distractions
Rewind two or three decades and you get to a time where the only distraction was probably a TV. Not all homes had computers and mobile phones were just that, a phone without a wire.
The distractions were much less and parents were also less busy. When the digital age caught speed, that picture changed dramatically and before anyone realized, their homes were invaded by technology that was supposed to make things easier.
It sure made things much more comfortable, and today we are so spoiled that we need dissertation writing service reviews to help us choose one that will fit our needs. Many things became easier, so much so that students can achieve top essay writing by clicking a couple of links and everything happens automatically.
When it comes to school work, tech is great and can help a lot. But when you want to have a conversation with your kids, it seems impossible.
They are glued to their small screens and other devices, the TV has become like the radio and is on, but no one really watches. As a parent, it is hard to compete with such superior devices, so the best thing to do is to remove the distractions.
Screen time is one of the new educational and parenting buzz words and you would do well when you limit your kid's screen time. Help them to develop proper listening skills by taking away the distractions and forcing them to develop this all-important skill of listening.
Only warn once
It often seems like your kids will test every boundary and will do the exact opposite of everything you ask of them. They are busy learning about boundaries and pushing to see where they are safe.
Contrary to what you might think, but kids actually love rules just like you like assignment writing help. They won’t necessarily agree with you, but deep down, they want to know where they are safe and you are the one who needs to show them the boundaries.
Many parents fall into the trap of repeating instructions over and over. They end up threatening and never getting to the actual punishment. There are many reasons for this, but the two main reasons why parents don’t act on their threats is because they either feel sorry for their kids, or they are just too tired to deal with the aftermath.
This is the time that you need to be strong and follow through with your rules. If you have asked your child to do something and they don’t do it the first time, then you need only warn them once.
Make the consequences clear and act upon it. If you haven’t done so in the past, then they will be taken aback at first, but they will come around sooner than you think. When you see a change in their behavior, be spontaneous and reward them from time to time as well.
Punishment is not your only weapon
People are weird creatures and what works on one person will have the opposite effect on someone else. If you have two or more kids, you will undoubtedly have noticed from a young age that your kids differ like night and day.
As an adult, you will have also noticed that there are things that you deem important that other people don’t. That is why we read reviews like Thesis Rush reviews to establish if a service will work for you or not.
Kids also react differently to discipline and learning. Some kids only need a firm voice and others will rebel against a stern command. As a parent, you need to figure out what works for your kids.
That means that you will teach your kids in different ways as well. The one child will only need an assertive look to be persuaded to follow your instruction, whereas another child will only respond to positive reinforcement.
What this means is that you will have to step up your affirmation game and give praise where it is due. In cases like these, you have to keep a balance, though.
You need to enforce positive behavior, not identity. It is easy for a child to develop a performance mentality and find his or her self-worth in achievements rather than knowing who they are.
The problem might be something completely different
No parent ever wants to learn that there might be a developmental problem with their children. If you have done everything in your power and jumped through all the disciplinary hoops to get your child to listen and nothing changes, then you need to consider other issues.
One can usually tell that the problem lies elsewhere if the behavior of the child is exhibited in more than one environment, like a school or a friend’s house.
This is when you need to ask yourself the difficult questions and start ruling out the other possibilities. You need to establish whether your child could have a hearing problem or maybe has a short attention span. It is never something that a parent wants to discover, but maybe there could be some other cognitive issue that is causing the behavior.
The best course of action is to take action. It doesn’t help anyone if you don’t want to admit that there could be an issue. The sooner the cause is identified, the sooner something can be done about the issue.
What you will find is that your relationship with your child will dramatically improve and you will spend way less time fighting than before. Your child will thank you and you will actually like your child.
The bottom line
No one ever said that parenting is easy, but if you see the hard times through, you will reap the rewards. There is nothing that can compare to the feeling of seeing your children succeed in life. The road to success is long and sometimes rather bumpy, but it is all worth it in the end.
You can take solace in the fact that you are not alone and that the problems you face is not unique. There are plenty of parents that have the same issues. Do yourself a favor and listen to the wisdom of others from time to time.